As National Grief Awareness Day approaches on Aug. 30, trauma expert Judith A. Swack, Ph.D., is shedding light on why some individuals remain stuck in grief long after a loss. According to Swack, unresolved trauma can keep people trapped in a cycle of painful memories, preventing them from accessing joyful recollections of their loved ones. Her insights come as her book, "Clear Trauma Now: The Powerful Solution for Getting Unstuck," has been named a 2026 Silver Medal Winner for Grief Books by the Coalition of Visionary Resources (COVR).
Swack explains that during a traumatic loss, the body's fight-flight-freeze response becomes conditioned to react to anything associated with that moment. This means that reminders of the deceased can trigger the intense shock and pain of the loss, causing individuals to relive the trauma repeatedly. "Healing begins by calming this trauma response, so the nervous system no longer reacts as though the loss is happening in the present," she says. To assist those struggling, Swack outlines five first steps toward healing.
The first step is to separate the trauma from the person you loved. Many grieving individuals fear that letting go of the trauma will sever their connection to the deceased. However, Swack asserts the opposite: trauma can become fused with the memory of a loved one, turning every remembrance into a source of pain rather than love. Healing the trauma allows positive memories and gratitude to return without diminishing the relationship.
Second, Swack advises identifying the "hidden layers" beneath grief. Grief is rarely just sadness; it often encompasses shock, fear, anger, hurt, guilt, shame, and helplessness. Recognizing these emotions is crucial for comprehensive healing. Third, she encourages listening for limiting beliefs that loss may have created. Traumatic loss can leave unconscious conclusions like "It's my fault," "People always leave me," or "I'm powerless," which can affect relationships, work, and self-confidence long after the loss. Awareness of these beliefs is a vital step toward recovery.
Fourth, Swack highlights the importance of paying attention to feelings of emptiness. A hallmark of unresolved loss trauma is a deep sense of emptiness or a "hole" in the chest or stomach. People often try to fill this void with work, food, or relationships, but recognizing it as part of the trauma response can guide them toward healthier coping mechanisms. Finally, Swack stresses that healing trauma is not about forgetting or "moving on." The fear that healing means leaving a loved one behind is a major barrier, but resolving trauma does not erase the relationship. Instead, it allows individuals to stop reliving the worst moment of their lives and begin recalling the love and meaning that preceded the loss.
"Healing trauma at all levels allows people to easily recall special memories of loving connection and appreciate the ways in which their lives were enriched by having known that person," Swack says. Her book details practices from her Healing from the Body Level Up™ (HBLU™) methodology, a system designed to clear trauma at the conscious, unconscious, body, and soul levels. For those interested in experiencing these techniques, Swack will host a "Clear Trauma Now Live Healing" webinar on Thursday evenings in September. More information is available at hblu.org/live-healing-experience. Swack, a biochemist and immunologist, combines scientific research with clinical experience to help individuals resolve trauma, anxiety, and chronic conditions, and she trains professionals worldwide through her work at HBLU.org.
